I was a classic dieting failure. So much so, that I stopped making weight loss New Year's Resolutions about 10 years ago. It was too depressing to fail.
And too dangerous! I am a stress eater, so when I would fail early on in a diet - I would stress eat and gain even more weight and feel even more sluggish and have Resolution Guilt to top it all off...nobody needs that.
I'm not sure why I was successful when I decided to switch to a Paleo diet. At least not in the beginning. Once I made it through the first 2 weeks, I was 100% hooked on how great I felt.
I think one of the reasons I made it through those initial 14 days is because of an old Facebook friend. She was on a journey to give up compulsive shopping. It was something to read! She spent money like I ate chips. That's what made me relate to it. And she worked with a professional therapist who had her do specific things to create new habits and a new reward system. I used both of these to help me during the switch to PaleoPlus.
The very basic premise of her success was learning to FOCUS ON THE POSITIVE! (and not spend all her energy on what she was trying to give up)Here is what we did (and are going to do beginning January 4, 2016)
Rewards and Celebrations
My favorite exercise was to create a list of non-food rewards to celebrate everyday things. I used to take the kids for a slushy or an over-priced cupcake or ice cream when they got good grades or some recognition in school. I would reward myself with my favorite take-out when I completed an unpleasant or difficult task. Every night we would find a reason to have a dish of ice cream as a family. It had become a series of unhealthy habits.
So, I made a list of things I enjoy that could substitute for the food rewards. Taking the dogs to a dog park. Playing my favorite computer game for 20 minutes without feeling guilty. Watching an episode of whatever Netflix show I am currently binge watching. Buying a new 'flavor' of EOS. Getting a pedicure. Hitting Five Below with the kids - you can easily spend $10 on cupcakes or ice cream, so I'd give them both $5 and let them loose!
I also added 3 Real Food rewards. I needed to break the mindset that healthy food is a punishment. I found REAL foods that could be a treat too! 1. Hot Cinnamon-Spiced Apple Tea (delicious without any added sugars), 2. Frozen red seedless grapes (yes, they are high in natural sugars, but compared to a bag of cookies, they win!) and 3. about once a week, I made "Nice Cream" (1 sliced frozen banana, 1 T dark cocoa powder, 1 t organic vanilla powder, 1 T coconut milk tossed into the food processor or blender - tastes like a Wendy's chocolate frosty, if you ask me!...this recipe is for 1 large or 2 small servings).
Teamwork
Make your list! Do it together with your Paleo Buddy or with your kids or spouse. Think about how you can reward yourself with things other than food. Or set a goal to do 10 things you've been wanting to do or visit 10 places you've been wanting to visit or see 10 movies you've been wanted to see. The key is to make your rewards things that excite you. Things that will motivate you to want to success - to want to "earn" these rewards. That way you can celebrate every milestone in your first 30-days of your PaleoPlus New Year! And you are bonding over the positives of your new real food commitment.
Share Something Positive Every Day
The other thing my that was suggested to my friend was to "share" her success stories. She has a big Facebook friend group, so she would share hysterical stories and photos of her NOT shopping. Funny captions that made breaking her addiction to shopping positive and upbeat and totally relate-able.
I started sharing my food and recipes on Instagram & Facebook and tagging them with #paleo and #cleaneating and #realfood and #whole30 and I found an entire community of people committed to Paleo and Primal eating. I got some spam and thong-wearing women promising me a thousand followers too...but that comes with any social media. I committed to at least 5 posts each week - which kind of forced me to be more creative when I was cooking or plating or packing a lunch because I wasn't about to post something unappetizing (it helped me clear the clutter out of my kitchen too...nobody wants to post their cluttered counter tops!). If you are at all competitive - this will be a motivator for you - I promise! I also shared the incredible health benefits I was experiencing with a small group of friends who I trusted to support me during my first 30-days. Some of the benefits are kind of personal...no need to post that for the world!
Discovering New Flavors
I made a habit of buying something new every time I went to the grocery or farmer's market and we tried it as a family. It was like Iron Chef judging at the table! We all had to have at least one bite and we all had to give it a score. Even if it was just a new type of apple or pear. Some things, like winter squash and ground chicken, I would make 2 or 3 ways. Sometimes it's not the ingredient you don't like - it's how it's prepared. It made it fun for me in the kitchen too!
Victory Board
I didn't actually make a bulletin board (although that was my original intention) - we put post-it notes on our pantry door! But every day I would add a post-it note with a small victory from my day "Didn't buy a cookie in the check-out line at Sprout's", "Walked an extra 20 minutes", "Packed healthy snacks and water for the football game", "jeans are fitting looser", "someone asked me if I'd lost weight (with a big smiley face!) and I would ask the kids to do the same. My daughter and I got pretty competitive to see who could decorate their post-it victory the best or come up with the most creative words or situations. And we tried to not duplicate any one victory during our entire first month. I am certain we will do this again in January to make squeaky-clean eating more fun!
These are the things we did to be intentional about focusing on the positive. Feel free to create your own ways to focus your attention on the great things you ARE doing and not on the couple of things you can't have.
It's not easy to change the way you've been eating your entire life - you have to give things up and learn to substitute and try new flavors, but if you get stuck complaining about how hard it is, you might lose sight of all the wonderful health benefits your are experiencing. Or you might not get a chance to celebrate the strength of your commitment to your body or your phenomenal weight loss or your new-found energy because you gave up when all you could think about was what was negative...don't let that happen to you!
Stay focused on the positive - it really is worth it!
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